Diet: A Mind Game
By Nikeva Mos, M.Sc. Health Psychology
Author of The Sirens of Exaggeration
Is going on a diet doomed to fail or is it a game our brain plays after all?
Amanda
Amanda is 28. A healthy young woman, interesting and lovable. Life has been good to her so far, as she enjoyed a happy childhood and, later, never had any serious problems to get her down. However, there has always been a thorn in her side: the extra pounds she has had for as long as she can remember.
Since she was 13, she has been constantly trying out every diet she comes across to lose weight. Sometimes, she was even tempted to go to extremes, but fortunately, her good sense prevailed and protected her from damaging her health.
After many years of losing a bit and gaining it all back, her bitter disappointment grew to the point of making her feel insecure about her looks and her ability as a person to set goals and succeed. If she couldn’t be in charge of something so totally up to her, how could she manage other aspects of life where she would have to deal with other people and uncontrollable circumstances? She realized that her low self-confidence caused her problems at work and in social life.
Finally, she decided to change her approach and tried a different angle of dealing with her problem: she visited a psychologist so as to understand herself better, empower her willingness to change, and face whatever was holding her back by working not only with her body but her mind as well. Now, a year later, Amanda has a different view of her goal and what she needs to do to get there. For the first time in her life, she is going down steadily, and in this case, that’s a good thing.
Dieting vs the Quest for Pleasure
From a psychological point of view, it doesn’t matter which diet we follow, but what our mindset is about dieting and losing weight. And one of the worst mistakes we can make when we decide to go on a diet is to believe that the whole thing is an unpleasant situation that will be over at some point and then say, “I can finally eat anything I like!”.
This belief alone can ruin our chances for success. Why? Because firstly, we convince ourselves of the extreme discomfort that we will suffer during the dieting period, and secondly, we make sure we fail to keep the results if the reward we promise ourselves at the end of the diet is a lot of food. What we need to understand is that the prize at the end of our diet is, apart from good physical health, the satisfaction of having good looks, the choice to wear almost anything we like, and, don’t forget, the victory of the mind over the stomach, whose job it is to ask for more and more without sense of the consequences. The pleasure of taste doesn’t depend on how much.
Now, let’s be truthful when answering this question: is there a real difference in taste between eating a piece of cake and the whole cake? The duration is longer for the second, but pay attention the next time you do it: doesn’t it start to be less tasty as you keep eating? The sensors in our tongue feel the sensation at the beginning; after a while, it is the brain that wants to keep eating because it hopes to get more and more pleasure by repeating something that brought joy and helped to get in a good mood. But what about the consequences? Who is thinking about them to make informed decisions?
Progress Counts
Another important problem that we may face is disappointment when we have started a diet, seen some results, and something happens that makes us feel that we fall behind. It can be about gaining back some of the pounds we lost or getting stuck. This is the point where most people give up and, even worse, put on more weight than they have lost that far.
The key here is the way we look at things and our beliefs about the situation. Many people who are unhappy with their weight see no point in dieting as they already feel fat. The same people, some years later and some pounds heavier, look back at the time of less weight and realize that they should have felt happier with the way they were and more confident about being able to become slimmer.
This regret shows that we don’t appreciate the positive side of the present moment and how much worse things could be, a thought that could give us the power to move forward. I mean, if I was 175 pounds and after a month of dieting, I went down to 160 but last week I put on 5, I need to remember how I felt at 175 and how happy I would have felt to see 170 on the scales.
The message here is that even if we are set back at a point in our dieting and stop losing or even gain a bit of weight, we are in a much better position than before. A position we would appreciate if we were at the beginning of our effort. So, we should be grateful for what we have done so far, pat ourselves on the back for doing well, and plan our next steps with determination.
Diet with a Thinking Mind
Dieting is a battle that, without the help of the mind, is very difficult to win. Many people report that when they are on a diet, they spend a lot of mental energy trying to make it work. Because in order for it to be successful, the first step is to visualize the goal in detail and know exactly where we want to get.
This goal needs to be front and center all the time. That way, the image of our future selves will help us avoid temptations of pleasure that will last a few moments (like eating ice cream) because it isn’t worth it compared to looking good all the time. The thinking mind needs to control our bad habits and the body, which only cares about pleasure and comfort.
We all know that food can be an escape from problems and negative feelings; that’s why we call the behavior comfort or stress eating. But even when we don’t feel strong enough to resist, we can still have it under some kind of control. So, we could eat a huge amount of something healthy and light that would fill our stomachs and make us feel better but not load the body with too many calories. Or, we could reassure ourselves that we will get that delicious piece of cake after lunch, but 20 minutes later. This has two purposes: firstly, the message from the full stomach will have reached the brain, and secondly, there is enough time to think it over and get over it. This gap will enable the conscious mind to control the emotion and take over the situation.
Every now and then, the desire will be so great that we will have that piece of cake, but if this doesn’t happen often, it’s a victory. And let’s not forget the pride we feel and the confidence we build as we take charge of ourselves and stick to our decision.
People and events are fictional and created for illustrative purposes. Any resemblance to actual individuals and situations is purely coincidental.
Disclaimer: This article is intended to offer views about daily life and well-being. In case you use any of the information in this article, the author assumes no responsibility for your actions. The information given in this article cannot replace the individualized help that health and mental health professionals can offer.
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